Thursday, 4 September 2008


Missed the kids immensely and when I arrived here the feelings were definitely reciprocated you could say I very much doubted and underestimated the impact that my mere presence had on these children. Again, lying in bed with a bad back and tummy that’s when you actually question why the hell you’re here!!! It’s been so emotional where I cannot hold back my tears as the pain has been excruciating and the peace of mind non existent especially when you cannot do anything, haven’t felt like writing anything on here either!

That said, had to snap out of this which was very difficult as it was affecting the kids, I’m only human and the strong emotions took hold of me… and those who know the power of emotions will certainly know what I am talking about!

It came to an abrupt end when my tears were then passed onto Pooja who clearly thought I was going to die especially after seeing her mum pass away, 2 brothers killed in an car accident and loosing her daddy to tuberculosis… she was sobbing and then clung onto to me as though I was going to leave her... how could I have done that? Blamed god first to why he is making me so ill … but then told by me beloved brother that it was a mirror image of my vibration which made so much sense.

Its been a few days now since I was unwell and what a difference health can make to mind, body and soul… still have to take it easy but I’m driving now which has made it so much easier and the roads are crazy!!! We won’t even start with the Rickshaw and the dreaded 3 wheelers… but what an adventure!

The heavens have recently opened of late which has resulted in major floods around the Punjab we even drove past an area where 25 villages have been destroyed, mother nature is definitely sending us messages which we need to take note before its too late! Me and the kids took advantage we walked around the whole complex feeling the cold water on our skin and drenching our clothes, could not thank God enough for the rain and enjoyed a good soak…

After mum left she mentioned on numerous occasions how much the kids love me and vice versa and how heart broken they will be after I left, so asked God what can these children be left with? What can light or hope can be ignited? What can we possibly give them that will remain after I’ve leave, yes its early days and there are another 4 months but they are innocent children thirsty for love and affection. People from all walks of life come into their lives and leave… so with the messages in order, there was a strong pull to recite devotional hymns (kirtan) with them, what an amazing connection, they pray every evening at the complex Gurudwara (Sikh temple) so for a few days we did the kirtan think they were taken aback that I actually knew what I was doing, to be honest was very much out of practice. It was amazing to hear the little ones humming away and the elder ones singing the words once we were done! They even got their harmoniums out the following day and wanted to learn it themselves… this did not cost any amount of money, was not materialistic but a gesture from my heart to theirs that we will always be in each others hearts for years to come.

We also had some great news, the wards are very much plain white and look like hospital wards without an ounce of colour or life, when I’d enter the children’s ward my one wish was to bring colour, to give these children a glimpse of the outside world!!! We were given permission, so work will begin in the next few days and we are all looking forward to getting paint everywhere and more importantly having fun!

We were also given permission to set up sensory room, God has showered his blessings today he really has, this will do so much for the children with cerebral palsy they will be able to communicate with colour and light! We cannot wait to see their faces and experiment, friends in U.S will now start raising some funds and Pingalwara will sort out the discrepancy… Again this will be such a milestone for the children, not to mention future recommendations - to have a soft play room and hydrotherapy pool!!!! That would just be the topping, icing, chocolate and strawberries on the cake, it would will be a breath of fresh air, essence and quality.

I’ve also been attending school and WOW what a difference a simple DVD and projector can make, where their days would drag and now after practicing their sports for the special Olympics, my students get a chance to watch DVD’s of their choice… the Indian version of SHREK is greatly amusing! Whenever they see me now they give me a round of applause I have to keep looking round to see what they are screaming at... until they bombard me, one of the them nearly knocked me out he was that happy and the other pinched me so hard he nearly bruised me! Guess I’m used to the violence too, their ways of telling me about time… we been waiting ages for ya!

I feel much better and cannot wait to see what God has in store, its like our life is canvas and we do not know what he will paint next, where his brush will strike or what colour… all we can do is ACCEPT and ALLOW.

1 comment:

Mandeep said...

I read your whole fun filled rewarding experience AGAIN. Something inside me lightenes up for sure.
You are multiplying your puniya on everyday basis.WOW.....